Anonymous asks :
Hi.
I've been split up with my ex for a while now we're both in new relationships. We've been through a lot, were together many years and remain friends.
At the end of last year he was still telling me how he loved me and missed me but yet was seeing other women.
I will always love him because he was the first person I ever loved and part of me believed him when he was saying all this.
He still tells my close family how he will always love me and asks how I'm doing.
Occasionally I see him- like today I was in a world of my own and he walked past me and called me one of our nicknames we had for each other.
By looking at us both you can tell how much we still love each other and it hurts me because part of me would do anything to go back to how we was but he put me through a lot.
I'm so thankful for the relationship I'm in now I'm just wondering have I done the right thing? HELP!
Exes are an easy trap to fall back into, and once you’ve developed deep feelings for someone, there will always be that little spark that remains.
Agony Aunts on Female First
Even through you may have love for each other, love is not enough to make for a happy healthy relationship. For example, if there is a lack of trust or respectful behaviour towards each other, and the relationship continually makes you question your self-worth, then you would be going back because of habit not because it is the best thing for you.
It sounds like you had a rollercoaster of a relationship, and if you were to go back now, you have to ask yourself realistically would that change?
First loves are particularly hard to let go of, as they shape us in many ways. However, first loves are rarely the loves to last a lifetime, they are there to teach us what we do and don’t want from a relationship. If the person you are with now makes you feel happy and secure, I wouldn’t look back because of feelings of nostalgia. Take the lessons from your previous relationship, and make this one an improvement on your last.
By Siobhan Copland
www.catchmecupid.co.uk
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