The average first-time mum doesn’t enjoy motherhood until the baby is six months old.
Parenting on Female First
New research has found that new mums rather than making the most of a new-borns’ precious first few months instead two thirds are more likely to feel stressed out and struggle with the changes taking place in their lives.
Mums have to come to terms with the inevitable sleepless nights but the study revealed more than half of women were surprised to find they suffered a lose of confidence as a result of not knowing what they were doing.
New mums found they were lost when it came to dealing with motherhood on matters including health, illness, feeding and safety.
This undermining of confidence caused just under half of them to feel their performance as a mother was being continuously judged by others.
And only 56 per cent felt their partner provided enough support during those exhausting first few months.
Incredibly, one in six mums didn’t really start to enjoy their little one until they passed their first birthday.
The Nurofen for Children study spokeswoman said: “When thinking about motherhood we tend to assume it’s the pregnancy which is the main hurdle, and that when the baby is born we’ll feel that first rush of love and then everything will be okay.
“In reality, the really hard work starts when the baby enters the world.
“There is a huge amount of adjustment for both parents, but for mums in particular as they go from being independent, career focussed people to having to spend 24 hours a day caring for someone else.
“And this can take a while to get used to – particularly as during the course of just 12 months a baby’s needs change so rapidly.”
The Nurofen for Children study shows 52 per cent of mums really felt like they had lost their identity after having a child, and 35 per cent really missed leaving the house and going to work.
The loss of a social life is a big change for many women, and 55 per cent said they found it difficult getting used to the fact they couldn’t simply go out whenever they wanted to anymore.
Similarly, many mums lost their common interests with existing friends, while 52 per cent feeling as though they had to carve out a new circle of friends so that they could socialise with people in the same boat.
And just over half of those polled found it hard to accept the changes childbirth had made to their body – which made them less confident in their own skin.
But the biggest challenge for women after giving birth was the lack of knowledge about their new role as a mother.
Why the baby was crying, why the baby wouldn’t sleep and how to get the baby settled into a routine left many mums baffled.
Knowing when the baby was ill, when controlled crying was appropriate and understanding when baby was simply having a grumpy day also left mums feeling confused and bewildered.
While 27 per cent struggled to juggle housework and producing a hot meal with childcare and 24 per cent found breastfeeding a real challenge.
But despite having a few wobbles during the early days, eight in 10 mums say having a child is the best thing they’ve ever done, and the positive aspects of motherhood now far outweigh the negative.
Leading GP and mum of one Dr Pixie McKenna, commenting on behalf of Nurofen for Children said: “It is easy to under-estimate the impact having a baby has on a woman’s life.
“Before embarking on parenthood, many women are settled in a job, know what they are doing on a day to day basis, and are confident in the role they have carved out for themselves.
“They have independence, aren’t responsible for anyone but themselves, and their abilities and decisions aren’t questioned constantly.
“The minute a baby comes along a woman’s world is turned upside down – with that initial rush of love and joy comes the unknown, and it is this which can throw women completely off balance.”
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