After years of alcohol and drug abuse, the acclaimed author and equal rights campaigner Elizabeth G. decided to reclaim her life. Now, more than two years later, she shares her own sobriety story and offers practical tips for staying sober, happy, and healthy.
Author & Campaigner Elizabeth G
My sobriety journey began in March 2022. After years of excess, the negative consequences began to outweigh the positives. I realised that drugs and alcohol had stolen the best parts of me—my sparkle, my smile, my positivity, and my energy. I no longer liked the person I had become after years of substance abuse.
I experienced many uncomfortable moments at the dinner table, feeling paranoid and anxious with a runny nose after nights of hard partying. I did my best to appear composed and conservative, masking my struggles with big smiles and an upbeat demeanour, even as I felt like I was dying inside. This façade was slowly peeling away, layer by layer, and it was exhausting.
Alcohol, in particular, stripped me of my awareness and dignity. Like many, I often made poor decisions while under its influence. I grew to despise the vulnerability that alcohol brought, realising how easily it allowed others with ill intentions to take advantage of me. It took one final toxic relationship and a drunken encounter with a so-called "friend" for me to finally declare, "No more."
I was uncertain about how I would get sober, but one thing was clear: I had an unwavering willpower within me – a magnetic force - to achieve it. This powerful desire became the driving force behind my journey to sobriety.
The first year of sobriety was challenging. I had constant cravings and had a couple of slip-ups. But I didn’t beat myself up about it. I’d dust myself off, pick myself back up and carry on. I was to learn that those slip-ups were just part of the process.
I was fortunate to have the support of an incredible therapist, Lillyanne. She focused on nurturing my inner child and tracing the roots of my deep desire for self-destruction back to my childhood. This process helped me understand why I felt compelled to obliterate myself.
Therapy became a journey of rewiring my brain by changing my thought patterns and reactions to various situations. Instead of reaching for a bottle in moments of distress, I learned to make healthier choices, especially when I was triggered or experiencing heightened emotions. These better choices included going for a walk, making a cup of tea, meditating, or simply sitting with uncomfortable emotions and allowing myself to feel them, knowing they would eventually pass.
By sitting with discomfort and expanding my awareness, I began to build resilience and strength to face life's challenges. It felt like exercising a muscle; over time, it became easier. Now, I instinctively make better decisions, as those new, healthier habits are ingrained in my subconscious.
Looking back on the progress I’ve made over the past two and a half years, I reflect on my journey with pride. I have transformed from a person who frequently desired self-destruction to someone who no longer wants that. I embrace my self-awareness and, after years of hazy hangovers and drug-fuelled parties, I finally feel awake.
I’ve attended numerous social events, including my book launch party, and confidently said “no” to alcohol. In my first year of sobriety, I avoided certain situations like festivals and clubs, but by the eighteen-month mark, I was able to venture back into those spaces, dancing the night away with nothing but a bottle of water.
What I cherish most is my newfound razor-sharp focus. I have an acute awareness I never thought possible, and I now handle challenging days with ease. In contrast, during my drinking years, I would isolate myself for days, overwhelmed by even the smallest issues.
I was amazed by the small, wonderful changes that emerged when I stopped using drugs and alcohol. Even within the first few months, I could fully concentrate on my goals, such as investing in a holiday rental, writing my book and, more recently, launching my website and podcast.
There’s no way I could have managed both projects simultaneously while drinking and using drugs; the anxiety would have been unbearable.
Saying no to drugs and alcohol while working as a sex worker was initially challenging. Some clients tested my boundaries and disrespected my choices, but I was determined to stick to my commitment. Over time, I noticed that as I rejected drugs and alcohol, I attracted more clients who also embraced a sober lifestyle. Like truly does attract like.
At first, telling clients, “I don’t drink,” felt daunting, but as my confidence grew, I began to embrace it with pride. Good clients understood, even if some were judgmental. One remarked, “That’s weird.” However, the more I said, “I don’t drink,” the more liberated I felt. It was like exercising a muscle; it took time to get used to, but eventually, it became second nature. I no longer cared about potentially losing bookings, knowing I would gain so much more in the long run. For the first time in my life, my health became my top priority—above making money, above friends and family. My health was at the forefront of my life.
My Top Tips for Getting Sober
1. Disconnect from Your Party 'Friends'
It’s essential to distance yourself from those who encourage unhealthy habits. I found that my so-called “friends” from my drinking days were not real friends. Evaluate your circle and choose companions who support your journey to sobriety.
2. Focus on Nurturing Yourself
Self-care can take many forms. I’ve increased my tea intake, especially herbal varieties, which serve as a comforting alternative to alcohol. Engaging in activities that promote well-being, such as long walks in nature without my phone, has greatly reduced my anxiety. Cooking has also become a soothing ritual for me. Remember to "eat like you give a shit about your body," and incorporate activities like reading and meditation into your routine.
3. Understand That Cravings Are Part of Getting Sober
Accepting that cravings will occur is crucial. When I feel a strong craving, especially during stressful times, I sit with the emotion, knowing it will pass. Being aware of the negative consequences of giving in to cravings has helped me make better choices.
4. Turn Your Focus to Consistency and Stability
My therapist emphasized the importance of consistency in my life. Making small, stable choices—like weekly nature walks or designated phone-free reading time—has helped prevent spirals into binge drinking. Surround yourself with consistent individuals and set healthy boundaries.
5. Embrace Changing Trends
The shift away from the ‘ladette’ culture has made it easier to socialize without alcohol. The rise of mocktails and non-alcoholic beers is a blessing in social situations.
6. Let Go of the Pressure of Never Drinking Again
My sobriety journey isn't about completely cutting out alcohol forever. I’ve learned to take the pressure off and focus on a period without drugs and alcohol to explore new opportunities. I may choose to have an occasional drink in the future, but for now, I relish the clarity and freedom that comes with sobriety.
Elizabeth G. is a British author and podcaster who campaigns for, and is a vocal advocate of, equality for sex workers. She is currently trying to expand the scope of The Equality Act 2010 to include the sex industry in order to protect those working within it from discrimination. Her candid memoir, ‘Unashamed: Why Do People Pay for Sex?’ is out now.