We talk to gift list manager Michelle Bernhardi-Toner at JusttheThing.co.uk about the rise of couples who are asking their guests to contribute to their wedding day.
Weddings on Female First
Why has the average British wedding risen to £20,000 in a recession?
The cost of British weddings has been steadily rising for some time now. UK brides & grooms-to-be are reluctant to compromise on wedding day details. We might be in a recession, but our Wedding Day is still seen as a ‘once-in-a-lifetime’ event.
Therefore, many couples would rather delay their wedding in order to save more money, than scrimp on their wedding essentials. Hence, we are seeing a decline in the number of couples getting married each year at the same time as we are seeing the cost of these weddings gradually increasing.
In my opinion, there are a number of influencing factors.
- UK brides & grooms are reluctant to scrimp on wedding essentials or forego any part of the big day.
- The costs of goods and services in the UK continue to rise, therefore, so do final Wedding Day bills.
- Celebrity weddings & bridal tv shows like ‘Don’t tell the bride’ can make some brides & grooms feel pressured to create more lavish, complicated or over-the-top affairs rather than small, intimate weddings.
- More wedding trends are making their way over from the USA and abroad to become part of UK wedding tradition. Including wedding favours, candy bars, ice bars, rehearsal dinners, grooms cakes & wishing lanterns. These are fast becoming ‘wedding essentials’ for brides planning their big day in the UK.
- Finally, we are marrying later in life; most UK newly-weds are now in their late twenties to mid-thirties. This means they are more established in their careers, and have had more time to form multiple social circles. There are the old school friends, the university friends, work friends & social friends along with close and extended family. Resulting in longer guests lists.
In what ways can guests help to contribute to the day?
Justthething.co.uk operates money gift lists for weddings, birthdays, Christmas and all sorts of celebrations. Our newest ‘Wedding Day’ gift list is a ready-made collection of items that can be added to a couple’s gift registry. It itemises everything a bride & groom might need for their wedding day. Each item can be ‘bought’ by family, friends or wedding guests instead of buying traditional boxed gifts. As items are bought, the money goes direct to the happy couple ready to use to book or pay for wedding day goods & services.
Why has the trend reversed, whereby you were bought gifts to help to set up your house?
We are getting married later in life. Once, a young woman would move straight from her parents’ home into her husband’s; hence the tradition of filling a new couple’s home with furniture, appliances, dinnerware & home essentials.
Most twenty first century couples have already set up home together or may have even combined two single households. They just don’t need the traditional cutlery, crockery & toasters.
As a result, we've seen a growing trend in the UK for cash gift lists which ask guests to contribute toward honeymoon or new home funds instead of buying traditional boxed gifts.
At Justthething.co.uk we felt that the ‘Wedding Day’ gift list was just a natural progression for couples looking for creative ways to raise the funds for their big day. Crowd sourcing is huge right now and we see our ‘Wedding Day’ gift list as a great solution for couple’s looking for creative ways to fund their wedding day.
How can having wedding day debt impact on a couple’s future?
Wedding day debt is a huge concern for newly-weds. Planning a wedding can already be very stressful. Adding debt and money worries on top of this can quickly turn what should be a couple’s happiest day into a series of sleepless nights and arguments.
Once the big day is over, couples want to be able to focus on their future together rather than worrying about paying off wedding day debt from their past. Paying off debt can prevent couples from being able to save for other important things like a new home.
Why are guests happy to contribute, not just the parents of the bride and groom?
A wedding day is a huge event, not just for the bride & groom but for their families as well. There is a long-standing tradition of more than simply parents contributing towards a couple’s big day. Grandparents, siblings, the maid of honour, aunts & uncles often pitch in too, to help cover costs, buy essentials or lend heirlooms. We’re just making it that much easier to give (or receive) a helping hand.
Since we first set up in 2006, our gift list managers have seen UK weddings become far less bound by antiquated wedding traditions or etiquette. Cash is officially the most requested wedding gift in the UK. And as wedding guests, don’t we simply want the best for the happy couple? I know I would rather give money towards something a couple really wants rather than give them something that may end up in the back of a cupboard somewhere unused and unwanted, or even returned to a store for credit.
We know that this particular package may not be for everyone which is why we also offer a ‘register anything’ service for people wanted to create more traditional gift lists or gift funds for their honeymoon, home or garden. As for the ‘Wedding Day’ gift list package, we hope that it will be a hit with any couples who may be currently struggling to fund their 2014 wedding day.
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