Hey soon-to-be couples, how’s the wedding preparation going?
It’s always such a nice feeling when two lovebirds come together to tie the knot.
Honestly, that’s one of the highest points of anyone’s existence.
Unfortunately, many people get their wedding wrong.
How ironic.
A wedding is supposed to be an event where you – the couple – create unique memories that last a lifetime. Not the “choreography-style” ceremony we see everyone pulling off.
I go to every wedding, and I ask myself:
- Why must brides always wear gowns and grooms suits?
- If the brides must wear gowns, why does it have to be white every time?
- Is it a must for the bridesmaids to be all women, and the groomsmen be all men?
- Why must couples be subjected to the stress of snapping a long list of formal portrait photos?
- Must wedding rings always be platinum and gold? Why not something unique and out-of-the-box like wooden wedding rings?
- Why invite hundreds of people to a wedding? Can’t you just have a select few people at your wedding?
In my bid to find answers, I discovered there are no formal rules guiding weddings. There are only traditions, clichés, and standards.
If you choose to do yours differently from the way the rest of the world is doing theirs, no one will hold a grudge against you.
The only problem is many of us are so engrossed in our cultures and traditions that it’s hard for us to change.
In this article, I’m going to show you a couple of traditions you can break away from and why it makes sense to do so.
Traditions that are worth breaking
1. Wearing white gowns and suits
There is no place where it is written in any law that brides and grooms have to be in gowns and suits, respectively.
Feel free to break away from this norm at your wedding by opting for something unique. For example, the bride can go for a classy reddish jumpsuit, and the groom a stylish denim attire.
Don’t believe me? Look at how adorable brides look.
2. Inviting crowd to a wedding ceremony
While the tradition is to invite a large crowd to a wedding ceremony, you can make yours unique by only inviting a small number of guests, including friends and family.
To make your guest invitation style even more impressive, you can invite a specific number of males and a specific number of females. For example, I only want 20 males and 20 females at my wedding.
3. All-women bridesmaids and all-men groomsmen
Bridesmaids and groomsmen don’t have to be an all-women or all-men affair. If you have friends who are opposite and will like to add them to the list of names on the bridesmaids or groomsmen, feel free to do so.
And in case you're feeling weird about it, just know that mixed-gender wedding parties are gaining a lot of traction lately, which means you aren't the first to do it.
4. Traditional vows
As sweet and romantic as wedding vows sound, if you've been to a countless number of weddings, you'll start to notice that they sound almost the same way.
Promises of always and forever, till death do us apart, stick with each other through thick and thin, and stuff like that.
Why focus your vows on marriage promises only? Why not use that opportunity to quickly narrate your love story?
Vows can be a good chance to let people know how you and your better half have come to reach where you are.
By and large, don't follow the trend and read to your guests how you intend to be with your lover forever; narrate a story that convinces them you will do what you're saying.
5. Exchanging rings
Every couple buys a golden, diamond, or platinum wedding ring. Break the norm, and go for a different material.
It could be Titanium, zirconium, tungsten, steel, or wooden wedding rings. These other materials, especially wood, are increasingly common wedding rings. So you have nothing to fear about being the first to use them. If anything, people will be amazed by your choice.
6. Snapping a long list of formal portrait photos
The formal tradition at weddings is to have couples snapping loads of photos.
Photo with male friends. Photo with female friends. Photo with all friends. Photo with grannies. Photo with parents. Photo with the bride's family. Photo with the groom's family. Photo with all family.
If this practice bores you, do not hesitate to kick it out of the day’s program.
It is not a must to snap with everyone at the event. Instead, you can instruct your wedding photographer to capture candid and special moments only.
7. Having a male best-man and a female best-lady
Who said your best-man has to be a guy? And your best-lady has to be a woman.
As the groom, if your best friend is your sister and you feel most comfortable around her, feel free to make her your best-man. Don’t worry; it won't look awkward in your wedding photos because people are already doing it.
8. Receiving line handshakes and formalities
It is a common tradition at weddings for couples to stand in a receiving line after the ceremony to meet and greet guests, get wishes from guests, and exchange pleasantries.
Yet many couples don’t like this practice.
But because it’s a tradition, they’re compelled to do it.
Alas, my friend, you don’t have to do the receiving line greetings if you don’t want to.
Allow your guests to take their leave immediately after the ceremony is over. And if anyone would like to give you a piece of advice or say congratulations, they can come and meet you.
9. Having a one-day wedding
The norm is to have your wedding on a particular day of the week?
But whose idea is this?
A wedding is supposed to be celebrated in the best way possible. And to do that, you might need more than a day.
You can have a court appearance on day one, go to church on day two, invite a select few friends to your house on day four, and have the everybody-can-come party on day five.
By and large, if you need more than a day to truly celebrate your big day, do not hesitate to give yourself that.
Why does it make sense to break away from the norm?
1. You get to be the talk of the town
Want your wedding memories to linger in the hearts of the public for decades to come? Take a hint and break away from the traditions.
If you do something different from what people are used to, the memories will never leave their minds. And they will keep talking about you and your event for years to come.
2. You get to do what you really want
Agreeing with the norm means going against what you truly want. For example, the tradition is that all bridesmaids have to be women. But what if your BFFs are all men? Will you go and borrow friends? Of course, not!
By doing what's different from the norm, you can have your wedding in the most comfortable manner.
3. Planning becomes easier
Breaking away from wedding traditions means you don’t have to go out of your way to do anything.
For example, tradition says you can have a church wedding and still hold a reception gathering elsewhere. If you cannot afford both, there's no need to stress yourself.
Also, tradition says your wedding ring has to be golden, diamond, or platinum. What if you cannot afford those or don’t like the feel of those on your finger?
Don’t worry; you can buy a wooden wedding ring instead.
Furthermore, in some traditions, the appropriate thing is for the bride’s father to walk her down the aisle. But who’s to stop you from having your mom do that if that’s what pleases you?
4. You get to create a different and unique memory
If you go by the norm, your wedding will end up being stereotypical.
However, if you break the norm and do exactly what you'll like to do, you get to create unique memories that are different from the average wedding ceremony.
For example, the tradition is to snap a collection of wedding photos at the venue of the event. Instead of this, you can create a unique memory by going to a special location different from the venue – with your guests and loved ones – for the photography session.
Tagged in Weddings