Dear reader, you will go to the hospital fundraiser ball. Although, as it's being organised by Colleen - who resembles one of the frumpier Beatrix Potter characters - and will be about as banging as one of Pippa's tea parties, you might not wish to do so. And you'd be in good company, as two people who really aren't interested in putting in an appearance are Belle and Drew. However, if they were to attend on each other's arm, we think they'd change their tunes a bit. As the do gets under way, all they can do is make eyes at each other across the vol-au-vents - and these little exchanges are not lost on their better halves. "You're still in love with Belle, aren't you?" mopes a mardy Lisa. "I'm sorry", Drew replies, as Lisa makes him wear his drink. Everyone watches on amused at this public spectacle, but nobody is more surprised by it than Belle. And after a short time has passed, she approaches Drew and asks him what happened. Biting the bullet, Drew confesses that he's still in love with her before leaning back out of slapping distance's reach. However, he gets a very different response. "I feel the same way", Belle sighs, before smirking like Heather Mills at an altar. That's all very nice, dear - but life's not going to be a ball for the poor cuckolded Lucas, is it?Knock down gingerHave you noticed that everyone with ginger facial hair in Summer Bay is a villain? (With the possible exception of Morag, obviously.) First there was the man who kidnapped Ryan; then there was the orange-bristled Johnny; and Rusty - who has arrived in town to track Sam down - has a beard like a fox's brush. As Sam and Jack squabble about Jack's supposedly neglectful behaviour towards Rory, Rusty prowls around the hospital hacking into computers to try and get Sam's new address. Later, at the hospital ball, Sam is still taking every opportunity to snipe. Jack soon reaches the end of his tether. "You can either decide to forgive me, and for us to try and be happy, or you can end this now", he sighs. "It's up to you." Sam follows him outside. "It's not rational," she admits, "and I've been unfair to you, and I'm so sorry." With these words, their relationship is set back on track. But from a distance, unbeknownst to them, Rusty is watching their every move. He takes out his phone and tells the person on the other end that he’s got a positive ID on Sam and her whereabouts. Sam and Jack saunter back into the Surf Club, oblivious to the dangers that await them... Doctor's orders Riddle me ree, Home and Away fans - would you accept a medical examination from somebody who's dressed as an engineering student circa 1996 and looks like he might want to talk to you about Lord of the Rings? No, we wouldn't either. So it seems that Kit's dish-faced squeeze has a lot to learn about working at the local hospital. Even Dr Rachel has started to smarten up a bit, with her flip-flops and hippy skirts swapped for dark suits and high heels and - lucky girl - better up-lighting. But despite his dress sense, Kit is still keen. While everybody else shimmies at the ball, the two of them relax on Kit's sofa with some champagne flutes of Perrier (Kit's up the duff, remember). "Everybody at the hospital thinks I'm gay", James laughs. (With those clothes, sweetie? We doubt it). And as if to prove his red-bloodedness, he leans in and snogs Kit as though he's trying to extract her wisdom teeth.

Meanwhile, back at the Surf Club, there's good news all round. Not only does Irene win a trip to an unspecified destination in Europe - look out Minsk! - but Brad takes the microphone to announce that he's pumped his inheritance from Emily into a new training facility named after Flynn. There's a huge ovation, but no one is blown away more than Sally. "Maybe you should stay with me tonight", she purrs. Mission accomplished, Brad. You dawg.


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