Olly Alexander "tried not to have a breakdown" over the controversy of him signing up for the Eurovision Song Contest.
Olly Alexander has spoken out about the controversy surrounding his choice to enter the Eurovision Song Contest
The 33-year-old star will represent the UK in the grand final of the annual competition on 11 May with the song 'Dizzy' but was pressured by a group called Queers for Palestine to boycott the show altogether over the inclusion of Israel amid their war on Gaza.
Just before joining Eurovision, Olly had signed a petition launched by the LGBTQ+ activist group calling for a ceasefire but remained committed to the contest as he declared that he "believes in the unifying power of music", although he later "struggled" on the day of the Eurovision Party performance in London in early April.
He told The Times: "Yes, I struggled on that day.
"I was holed up in a room trying not to have a breakdown. Normally, you get on stage and turn it on, but I felt really unable to do that. It was tough."
The 'It's a Sin' actor noted that a "combination" of things had led to his lacklustre performance on that day as he admitted feeling "ashamed and embarrassed" over the controversy.
He said: "A combination. It has been quite tricky — to say the least. I just could not get it together and then I felt ashamed of myself and embarrassed."
Olly admitted that he knew some of the other signatories on the Queers for Palestine petition but claimed that no one had been in touch with him and wishes things were "different" but has ultimately decided that things are "so much bigger" than his Eurovision entry.
He said: "I know quite a few and nobody reached out to me. It’s quite tough to receive a letter like that. Obviously there are a lot of things I wish were different. And this is so much bigger than me and Eurovision, it really is. But, obviously, I wish there wasn’t a war or this insane humanitarian crisis. I wish for peace and I have found this experience, at times, extremely …I’ve just felt really sad and distressed.
"But I still believe it’s a good thing when people come together for entertainment. That’s why I wanted to do Eurovision."