Gemma Collins' relationship caused her to have a nervous breakdown.
'The Only Way Is Essex' star called off her engagement to Rami Hawash last month and has now admitted she was unhappy throughout the three-year romance as the mechanic was abusive and destroyed her self esteem.
She said: "It was a gradual thing. He made me feel bad about myself. He'd say I was a 'fatsie'. If I got dressed up to go out he'd say, 'Look at you' with this sneer on his face and tell me I should put on jeans and a top. We would row all the time...
"I honestly think I went through a nervous breakdown. I felt under such pressure. I was trying to keep all these plates spinning - my business, 'TOWIE', my relationship - and I was exhausted from it.
"I'm naturally a happy person but particularly toward the end I know my personality changed. I'd blow up over small things, I was comfort eating because I was unhappy, and I didn't like going out. I ended up putting on about three stone. For the past three years, it's like I've been hovering on the edge of a breakdown. I haven't been happy for a very long time."
Gemma - who admits she often felt Rami was only with her because of her fame - is grateful for the support of her 'TOWIE' co-stars, particularly ex-boyfriend James 'Arg' Argent.
She told Now magazine: "The girls have been amazing. When things were bad Jess Wright or Sam and Billie Faiers would take me to one side and look after me. They all told me they saw my personality change
"But Arg was my rock. When we had fights I'd sometimes go and stay with Arg and his parents. I always knew I could turn to him and I knew he wouldn't judge me. He was kind and he'd listen and dry my tears. I love him to bits."
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