Kevin Kennedy - 'The Street to Recovery'
Kevin Kennedy has faced a tough battle with alcoholism, but he's come out of the other side of it, making his life better than ever and marking 15 years sober.
We got the chance to chat to Kevin about his new book, his demons, a long-spanning career and what advice he'd offer to those who may be going through a situation similar to the ones he's lived.
How did you find the process of rehashing your past to write your new book?
It's a bit of a long process, and I wasn't looking forward to it. In fact, I kind of steered away from it for quite a long time because I just didn't really want to go back there. People were asking me to write it straight away, after I'd just recovered - I'd only been sober, maybe a month - and I couldn't look at it because I didn't know enough about the disease, or I didn't know enough about myself. I'd only been sober for five minutes, so I thought I'd better wait because I really didn't know what I was talking about.
So, I waited for 15 years, and that's when I decided 'I think now enough time has passed' - to have a look at it. It wasn't a very pleasant - parts of it were great, the showing off bits were great; the 'I did this' and the 'I became this' and 'I got this part and that part', 'I travelled here and there' - that was good - but the really sort of nitty-gritty stuff of it was still an area that I'd not looked at, and therefore was still quite a diseased area, and I didn't enjoy that at all - but who does? No-one likes looking back and admitting their mistakes.
So, it was a difficult process, but in the end it was fine.
Going back, it was the producer of Coronation Street that sent you to rehab at the time - can you describe how you felt at that moment?
Well, I'd given up at that point. I'd actually surrendered. I did not want to get back in the ring again with alcohol. It was a clear moment of sanity - a window of opportunity, which I realised there and then that if I didn't do something, then the likelihood would be that I would end up dead, so it was a lovely moment of surrender, and also a very scary moment. That was my worst moment and my best moment - the rock bottom, and also this view of hope.
A lot of people can't relate to alcoholism - can you describe how an alcoholic feels when they cannot get a drink?
It's very difficult to explain. It's a craving, it's an obsession, a mental obsession, it's a physical obsession, and a spiritual obsession - it's three-fold. The mental obsession is probably worse than the physical craving - the mental obsession is that you will do anything to hunt it down - you need to have it - and that I think is the epitamy of addiction, where all normal rules go out the window. You have to have your drug of choice, and my drug of choice was alcohol. For some people, it's shopping, for some people it's shoes, for some it's drugs, but mine was alcohol and it's this mental obsession that drives you on, and on, and on, until you manage to get to it.
What advice can you give to those who may be going through a similar situation to the one you've been through?
It's very simple - you don't have to do this alone. You're not alone. There are many, many people out there that have been through what you're going through - please ring one of the many, many helplines that are out there, and get yourself some help. You'd be amazed just how many people know exactly what you're talking about - that was the amazing thing for me. I didn't realise - this disease isolates you and makes you believe that it's really only you and you're a bad person - and you're not a bad person, you're just ill - and that is what you need to get your head around - and the fact that other people have been where you are, and know the answers.
Fast-forward to today and you've been sober for 15 years - how has your life changed?
It's changed immeasurably. I'm a lot happier, I have more time on my hands for my children - I haven't got this mental obsession with alcohol where I have to seek it out all the time, my life is not perfect by any means, but I realise that if I don't take a drink on a daily basis then I'm in with a chance.
It's only a daily reprive, and that's a double-edged sword, because I only have to think about today. Tomorrow's not here yet, and yesterday's gone, and I was sober yesterday and hopefully I'll be sober today - tomorrow's a different thing. So, my life's changed immeasurably, and all for the better.
You've been in the cast of We Will Rock You for three years now - how have you found that experience?
Oh, it's an amazing experience. I thoroughly enjoy the shows. It's a very, very funny script by Ben Elton, and it's got the music of Queen, and it encompasses everything I love - which is music and acting and live theatre. So, really, I'm on a win-win-win situation.
It's been in the West End for 11 years and that is - things don't stay in the West End for very long if they're not very good - so that is a testamant to how good it is.
Is that something you hope to continue doing long-term?
Well, I don't know. You never know what's around the corner. I'm certainly there until October and after that - I don't know.
Are there any plans to bring back the character of Curly Watts to Coronation Street?
Well, I don't have any plans - I think that's down to the powers that be, and if they decide that's the case, then that'd be superb. If they decide that's not the case, well then that's life.
So that's something you'd still love to do?
Yeah, absolutely.
The Street to Recovery by Kevin Kennedy is available now, published by Paperbooks. £12.99, hardback.
Tagged in Kevin Kennedy