Tonight lines will open at the start of the show for viewers to vote for and save their favourite chef. The celebrity with the least amount of votes will be sacked. Starter MARCO’S NEW MENU - IT’S A BRIT OF ALRIGHT Yesterday’s morning meeting, and the celebrities arrived promptly for a surprise which Marco had promised the night before. But the surprise soon turned into a shock when Marco revealed that their very next service would be from a totally new menu – and their very next service was that night. Marco said: “I told you you’d like your surprise didn’t I; because there’s less of us now I’m not saying I’m making it easier, I’m making it different. What we’re going to be doing now is English.”Abbey said: “Sausage and mash!”Marco: “Not quite that low.”The celebrities were delighted to see shepherds pie on the menu and Paul said:

“This is going to be great because my kids are coming on Wednesday.”

“It’s a whole new dessert menu!” said Brian in a panic.

The new dishes include: a cocktail of oysters served raw – similar to the one Barry drank last week, a cocktail of lobster with Marie-rose sauce, fried turbot with chips and mushy peas, oxtail and kidney pudding, shepherds pie and butter peas, partridge; and new desserts including lemon meringue pie, sherry trifle and treacle tart.

Marco said of the new menu:

“I’ve left the asparagus on for the vegetarians, and I have a pet hate for vegetarians.”

“To continue with the menu they’ll get complacent. It’s too easy for them. So … I think we’ll change. We’ll sidestep them, tilt them off balance and see how they adjust to that.

“Let’s go English, it’s England. We will go English, shepherd’s pie, fishcakes, fish pie, partridge in pie. Love it! And I think the customers will too. It’s just a bit of a change.”

******* Main

MARCO PASSES ON SERVICE

It was the first night of the new menu but Marco was nowhere to be seen by the diners. His usual spot at the pass was not occupied – because he had retreated to his office for the duration of service busily making the new and very detailed cold starters – cocktails of lobsters and oysters.

Marco, who handed the top job over the sous chefs said: “The reason I stayed in the office oyster is because it’s like a larder – it has air conditioning and perfect temperature to prepare cold food.

But the rock star chef hated being out of the lime light:

“I hated being away from my pass. It took me away from my position and I think Barry, Paul and Anneka missed that. They missed that direction Matt took over the pass and guided them through.”

CLANCY’S CHICKEN CAVIAR

Day one of the new menu and Abbey came up with her own variation of a blini – by mistake.

She said:

“I had to make blinis – just a horrendous job. You are supposed to cook them in clarified butter. I just saw this big pot and thought it was clarified butter – but it was chicken stock.”

When sous chef Roger spotted the mistake he asked her what she had done and Abbey said don’t worry no one will notice. But Roger wasn’t so sure:

He told her: “You can’t cook them in chicken stock – they go with the caviar!”

Abbey said in the confessional – “So I cooked them in the chicken stock and Roger said ssssh don’t tell Marco.”

But when Marco saw the blinis on the cooking rack he was amazed:

Unaware of the mistake he said : “Your blinis are extraordinary Abbey! Look at them Roger, they are better than yours! You should be very proud of what you have taught her.”

******** Dessert

JIM LEAVES HIS MARK

After a busy night in the kitchen, the celebrities unwound over a late night drink in the garden and reflected on Jim’s departure.

“Has the sticker gone?” Paul asked looking at the chair at the head of the table.

Brian said – “I took it off….How weird is that – he [Jim] left a sticker with his name on at the head of the table.”

Abbey said: “There is a spit roast in the corner – we should have put it on that!”

Paul said: “A psychologist could have a field day with that.”

Brian: “For some strange reason you do miss having him around.”

Barry: “I do miss him – I actually miss his grumpiness….But you don’t miss the vile spitting.”

Referring to the last row Jim had with Brian, Paul said: “There was just a moment where he went over the top – over the edge.”

Barry then said: “I really hope that people like that who at one stage were brilliant - brilliant comics, that they find peace.

“People would be so subservient to him. He had a dogma. A very dogmatic person.”

“He had a lot of power in this house. He had a clever way of argumentation.

Barry said : “I really do miss him and I really do hope he gets his life sorted out. himself out.”

********

Last orders

JO WHILEY PUCKERS UP TO ANGUS – LIVE!

During last nights service, celebrity diner Radio 1 DJ Jo Whiley kissed presenter Angus Deayton on the cheek live on air during one of his links. Yesterday morning (Tues) self-confessed saviour of Radio 1 Chris Moyles had heard she was dining at Hell's Kitchen and dared her to do it for a bet – worth £500 - to go to charity. If you missed Jo's victorious moment here’s the clip. (AVAILABLE ON REQUEST DUE TO FILE SIZE) After fulfilling her side of the bargain Jo returned to the table she was sharing with fellow Radio 1 DJ Scott Mills and revealed that Angus had very soft skin. Jo said: “Angus has very soft skin, like a baby. We didn’t know where he was, we’d been looking for him all night long and all of a sudden he was there and it was the perfect opportunity to grab him. I do feel like I can relax now and enjoy myself.” Jo said: “There was money riding on this and it’s all for charity and if I hadn’t done it then I would have felt really cross with myself.” Scott said: “I didn’t think she would do it in a million years!” Jo: “Angus was just so perfectly poised standing there waiting for his cheek to be kissed. I had to.” Scott: “I honestly didn’t think she’d ever do it and I’m sorry, I have to say sorry to the people of Hell’s Kitchen on Jo’s behalf. But it is for charity.” Jo: “You failed though, you were supposed to rugby tackle Angus, that was £1000!” Scott: "They would have shot me or something if I’d done that. Well done though Jo." Jo said the £500 is going to be donated to Mencap. “Chris Moyles now owes me £500 which will go to Mencap and he’s got to pay up!”