Julian Velard
Hello there little monster, what are you up to?
Not much, just eating cereal and watching This Morning. Holly Willoughby is mesmerizing.
So, tell me a bit about what you’re here to promote?
I'm promoting my single Love Again For The First Time, out March 21st, and the album it's from, Mr. Saturday Night, out March 28th. You should by it. Does wonders for your complexion.
And if we didn’t have any clue as to who you were, what three words sum you up?
Seinfeld Piano McQueen (fourth would be Bowtie).
And as Jacko had the Moonwalk and Elvis had the snake hips, what do you have that makes you unique?
Massive lips and pearly whites. I'm like Jagger with Dentures.
Now, clearly we need to get to know each other more, so tell me an interesting fact about you that noone else knows?
I am astoundingly good at basketball for an awkward white guy.
What song do you wish you’d written?
How Deep Is Your Love by The Bee Gees. Chuuuuunnne!
If I was contemplating coming to your show or sitting at home and TV, how would you convince me to come out?
My music is an aphrodisiac. Everybody in the room gets sexytime.
And if you were to take me on a trip to your hometown, what would be the first place we’d go?
Walk across the Brooklyn Bridge at sunset. Or up to the 102 floor Observatory (not the 86th) of the Empire State Building. Two of the best vistas in the western world.
Who was the last person you called / text and what for?
My friend Miles about what movie he wants to see tonight. He gets free tickets to Odeon cinemas. We're real close.
If you were a superhero, what would be your superpower?
The ability to freeze time. Like Evie Garland on that show Out Of This World. Did you get that in England? She really under utilized its potential.
If you had to date a member of the same sex who would it be?
Freddy Mercury. Or Don Draper (not Jon Hamm, there is a distinction).
What was the last thing you bought?
A tortoise shell Triwa watch from Carter and Bond in Westbourne Park. It's a colorful plastic rolex imitation. I'm a cheap pimp.
Have you ever been arrested?
No. But I have performed many citizens arrests. Mainly on people who don't obey pedestrian codes of conduct. You'd be amazed how many bad walkers there are in this world.
Speaking of prison - if you were to send someone to prison for crimes against music, who would it be?
Three words: Black. Eyed. Peas.
What were you doing last night at 11?
Watching How To Lose A Guy In 10 Days and eating cereal. Why did you ask that question? I hate you.