The Cumshots
Max Cargo looks like he might just kill you. A TV presenter who does not own a TV, he’s had lawsuits for allowing naked activists to screw on his band’s stage in order to save the forests.
He has spent a week eating the unhealthiest of foods while living in an Oslo shop window as part of a televised experiment, and has undergone plastic surgery in the name of entertainment. He is also the vocalist for Norwegian nutters The Cumshots, which might go some way to explaining the band’s uniquely wild sound.
Bestowed with the tag of “Death’n’Roll”, The Cumshots have been alarming conservative Norwegians with their unique blend of metal, punk and whatever the hell else they feel like throwing into the mix since the release of their first album in 2001.
With Norwegian Grammy nominations under their belt, they are now setting their sites on the rest of the world and plan to come crashing into the UK next month. The band sent in the following warning:
“Ok, "beautiful" people of Britain. We are coming. The Cumshots will be doing a short tour of England in May. And just for you, we will be re-releasing our latest album "Just Quit Trying" for the UK in a vain attempt at getting laid while we are there. It all starts with a show at "The Luminaire" in London May 11th, with a launch party at The Crobar on the 13th.
“For your own sake (do not worry about us) be sure to take the next days off from work. Whatever you have read about us (the sex, the violence, the guns), please do not expect it to happen. We never plan anything, so whatever happens happens. Ok ? The only thing we can guarantee you is that none of the shows will be boring. The day we are boring is the day we will kiss the gun.
If you have not heard us before do not worry. We will guide your saggy chipsridden bottoms safely through the evening. Hard, selfdestructive rock to the level of absurdity will be on the menu. You may all come naked, but be sure to bring your friends.”
You can catch The Cum’ at the following shows:
11.05. The Luminaire London
13.05. The Crobar London
15.05. Rios Leeds w/special guest Ovmnivore