Tess Holliday insisted it's "OK to grieve your body" as she opened up on her body dysmorphia battle.
Tess Holliday struggles with body dysmorphia
The 36-year-old model alleged earlier this year that her marriage to Nick Holliday was “abusive, unhealthy, and toxic”.
And she has just opened up about how she would "glamorise" how she looked in old photos from then, but she was actually going through a "deeply unhappy" period in her life.
Tess suffers with the mental health condition, BDD (Body Dysmorphia Disorder) - where people are obsessed with their appearance - and she explained how she spirals whenever she sees old images of herself online.
And as well as going through a toxic relationship, the catwalk beauty said she suffered her "most disordered eating" episode.
Tess posted on Instagram alongside snaps of her working out and various quotes about self-doubt: "My happy place w @soraconnor, working out and trying to stay present in my body without self-doubt or self-judgment.
"My body dysmorphia has been really trying me lately & when photos from previous years pop up while I’m scrolling through my phone, it causes me to spiral a bit.
"Then I have to check myself & ask: “Why are you really sad?” because I like how I looked there - but I was also in the throws of my most disordered eating, in an abusive relationship, and so deeply unhappy. (sic)"
Tess has accepted that her body doesn't always "look or feel like me", and she has never been "happier".
She continued: "Now, my body is different but my heart is fuller. I smile a lot more these days, & I know y’all have noticed how much happier I am too. It takes work to look at old photos of a body I miss (it’s okay to grieve stages of your body) & see instead how unhappy I was back then instead of glamorizing those moments that were far from perfect. In the photos I take today, my body doesn’t always look or feel like ME, but the joy? The self love for WHO I am not how I look? That’s real. This is why I say that our sizes and weights don’t effect our worth, because bodies evolve, and moments fly by us so quickly. And I don’t want to waste a minute of my beautiful life because I’m worried about a new stretch mark. #effyourbeautystandards (sic)"