Edinburgh Fringe Festival 2022: Helen Bauer shares why comedy helps her mental health

6 June 2022

In the summer of 2018 I was at my lowest. Nothing had happened, in fact technically everything was going well. I was renting a lovely flat in London with some friends, I had a nice day job working in a bakery down the hill from my flat and my comedy career was starting to get going. Despite all this I was really losing the battle to be happy and stay happy. I stopped going to social occasions, stopped making plans to meet up with anyone and was finding it harder and harder to complete a shift at work. I was isolating myself and didn’t know what to do.

Helen Bauer by James Deacon

I was performing more comedy than I ever had. It should have been a struggle, after all everything else was but instead it was the only place I could have fun and be myself. I felt good about myself being able to make those in front of me laugh and enjoy themselves. When I had a bad gig it didn’t matter, I was already down so nothing was lost, I could try again the following night. I found at that time the more honest I was about my mental health on stage the better I felt about it. There is something amazing about connecting with people by laughing at the situation you are in and I was told that a laugh is a recognition of truth. I believe that and therefore felt so much less alone and trapped in my depression and anxiety.

The downside of my comedy working when I was struggling meant that I was a bit slow in seeking proper treatment. I am not alone in this and many comedians have gone through a similar though pattern of ‘If I am better. If I am not so mentally ill. Will I still be able to make people laugh?’ It probably sounds ridiculous to a non-comic and the mentally well but I can tell you after struggling to believe that treatment would not change me on stage, you do need to seek help. After receiving help, therapy and finding the right medication for what I was going through. I was still myself on stage. I was still funny and honest in my own way but instead of having to go through a big battle with my brain to get to the gig and talk to people off stage I was able to enjoy the night. Not just the night, I was able to enjoy my life again.

Doing comedy helps my mental health, it makes me happy and gives me a purpose. Wouldn’t it be incredible if I could get that just from general life eh!? I still have a lot more therapy to do. Until then comedy is my outlet and I count myself so lucky that I found it. Comedy got me out of my head and out of my house and I am so thankful it did and continues to.