Katy Perry was "ashamed" when she was prescribed medication to combat depression.
Katy Perry
The 35-year-old singer has spoken openly about suffering a breakdown following the flop of her fifth album 'Witness' in 2017 and a break-up with now-fiance Orlando Bloom and she's admitted she was left unable to get out of bed for "weeks" as her mental health plummeted.
She recalled: "I broke up with my boyfriend. My expectations weren't met and the world didn't want to hear from me anymore at that moment.
"They were like, 'That's enough. Thank you very much. You've given us something and we're good.'
"And I just couldn't get out of bed for weeks and became clinically depressed and had to get on medication for the first time in my life.
"I was so ashamed of it. I was like, 'I'm Katy Perry. I wrote 'Firework.' I'm on medication. This is f***** up.' "
Katy was shocked when she realised she wasn't able to get through her difficult period with music, as she always had in the past.
Speaking to Apple Music's Zane Lowe, she said: "I realised, 'Oh my God. I have given so much power out for validation and acceptance and love, and now it's not coming back to me.'
"I used to really be able to fix my depression or my bouts of depression by just going, 'I'm going to write a freaking song,' or, 'I'm going to do this. So blah, blah, blah. I'm going to whatever. I'll leave you in the dust. You break up with me, I'll show you. Here's a number one one.'
"It didn't work anymore."
The 'Chained To The Rhythm' hitmaker - who is expecting her first child with Orlando - has finally been able to "quiet" the negative voice in her head.
She said: "The last two-and-a-half years have been a psychological, spiritual, emotional journey of just pulling the petrified poison out of my body and rewiring my neural pathways and that negative thought ticker that keeps coming says, 'You're just lucky. You're just cute. You're not really good. You're not very talented. You're lucky. You're just lucky,' or, 'You're not worth it. You're not good enough. You're getting old. You're fat,' all that s***.
"I figured out how to quiet it the f*** down."
Ultimately, Katy feels "grateful for the pain because it pushed me towards the growth" and is in a good place because she is no longer a "thirsty, desperate pop star that's just trying to hit a number."
She added: "I feel like I've got more dimension. I have a baby on the way. I have a fiancé. I love my nieces. I love my soon-to-be stepson. I love life."
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