Hayley Williams was "not okay" following her divorce from Chad Gilbert.
Hayley Williams
The Paramore frontwoman split from the New Found Glory musician in 2017 after a decade-long romance, and has said she struggled to cope following their break up, as she lost so much weight she weighed just 91 pounds.
She said: "It wasn't until I saw the pictures that I was like, there's no hiding that I'm not OK now. And part of me enjoyed that - if people know I'm not OK, they won't get too close. What happens in our brains often manifests physically if we don't take care of it."
Hayley was helped through the tough time by her Paramore bandmates, but when she was on tour for the band's 2017 album 'After Laughter', she turned to alcohol.
She added: "[I was] looking to break free from a prison that I'd put myself in and to also forget at the same time."
And despite her struggle, the 31-year-old singer wouldn't describe herself as "depressed" during that time.
The 'Simmer' hitmaker explained: "What I hated was at the time it was still sort of new to see the word 'depression' - it became such a hot-button word, almost clickbait? she says. "And it scared me to become part of that conversation, especially if I wasn't even sure what was actually going on with me.
"One of my biggest healing moments was realising that a lot of my depression was misplaced anger. I really forced it inward, on myself, and it made me feel shame all the time," she says. "It helped me understand things that happened throughout my life that weren't right."
Hayley also spoke about what led to her split from Chad, as she said their romance was "very unhealthy", and that the 'My Friends Over You' hitmaker "probably looks at [her] like the villain".
Speaking to The Guardian newspaper, she said: "Throwing around my version of someone else's story doesn't feel fair, which is funny because I don't necessarily think it should be fair. Especially not after the s**t I went through."
Tagged in Hayley Williams