Gabrielle Union's surrogacy process was an 'underground railroad'

30 April 2019

Gabrielle Union's surrogacy process felt like an "underground railroad of infertility."

Gabrielle Union

The 46-year-old actress welcomed her first child, a daughter named Kaavia, with her husband Dwayne Wade five months ago when she was born via surrogate mother, but has said the journey to her tot's birth was difficult because "nobody" was willing to talk to her about potential fertility options.

She said: "Nobody was really open when I had questions. [It was like an] underground railroad of infertility.

"The only reason I heard about certain doctors or treatments or new technologies or new procedures - whether that be diet or Eastern philosophy - was through a whisper network, and mainly from women who did not look like me or who had a very different journey through life than I did."

And despite the struggles she went through, the 'Being Mary Jane' star wanted to be as open with her fans as possible in order to dismantle the stigma surrounding infertility.

She added: "So much of the Instagram life is creating these perfect illusions, right? People have kids - even through surrogacy or IVF or whatever - and the kids just appear. Rarely do we hear how. What was the journey? Without understanding what got to baby, it feels like easy and overnight. And that's not the case.

"I would never say that I'm giving anyone permission, but sometimes it takes somebody doing something to be like, 'Oh sure, I can talk about this. It has no bearing on my value, my worth, the validity of my motherhood journey.' So I try to be as open as possible. I'm telling people the water's warm. Dive on in."

Though she's delighted to now be a mother, Gabrielle - who also helps to co-parent her husband Dwyane's sons Zaire, 17, Zion, 11, and Xavier, five - still struggles with having never experienced pregnancy.

Speaking to Glamour's latest digital issue, she said: "I'll see a pregnant woman and I just feel like, 'Damn', you know? I'll ask myself, 'Would my relationship with her be different?' And then I go home and have a whole-a** baby."