Ellen DeGeneres found it "devastating" to be branded "mean".
Ellen DeGeneres was devastated by the claims made about her
The 66-year-old comedian's long-running daytime talk show came under fire in 2020 over allegations of a toxic workplace and while she used to "care what people think" of her as a way to calculate her success, she's given up worrying about the opinions of others after allowing the negative labels to "consume" her.
Speaking on her latest Netflix special, 'For Your Approval', Ellen said: “When you’re a public figure, you’re open to everyone’s interpretation. And I’m sure you’ve heard the saying that, ‘What other people think of me is none of my business.’
"Because people will say all kinds of things and you have no control over that. But you know the truth and that’s all that matters.
“I’ve spent an entire lifetime trying to make people happy and I’ve cared far too much what other people think of me...
“If they like you, you’re in, and if they don’t, you’re out. And I’ve spent an entire lifetime trying to make people happy and I’ve cared far too much what other people think of me. So, the thought of anyone thinking that I’m mean was devastating to me, and it consumed me for a long time.
“After a lifetime of caring, I just can’t anymore. So I don’t.”
Ellen is "proud" of the person she is now and would rather be remembered as a "beloved" personality.
She continued: “But if I’m being honest… and I have a choice of people remembering me as someone who was mean or someone who was beloved. Be-lov-ed? Beloved? Beloved. Someone who is beloved? I choose that.”
The 'Finding Dory' star - who is married to Portia Di Rossi - has gained "perspective" with age.
She added: "[I am] happy not being a boss or a brand or a billboard, just a person.”
Ellen had claimed to be stepping out of the limelight following the stand-up show, which was filmed earlier this year.
Speaking to the audience at her gig in Santa Rosa, California, she said when asked where fans can see her next, and replied: "Um, no.
"This is the last time you're going to see me. After my Netflix special, I'm done."
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