Billie Lourd has described her grief over Carrie Fisher's death as a "multi course meal with many complicated ingredients".
![Billie Lourd has opened up on grief](/image-library/partners/bang/land/1000/b/billie-lourd-aW1hZ2VzMS8yMDIxLzAxLzA4LzE2MTAwNjQyMTljcm9wcGV.jpg)
Billie Lourd has opened up on grief
The 19-year-old actress - whose late mother died aged 60 on December 27, 2016 - paid tribute to the 'Star Wars' icon on the anniversary of her passing and revealed everyone deals with things as their own pace.
Alongside an adorable throwback photo of her, Carrie and a koala bear, she wrote: "People always ask me what stage of grief I’m in. And my answer is never simple.
"I’m in a different stage of grief in each moment of every day. My grief is a multi course meal with many complicated ingredients.
"An amuse bouche of bargaining followed by an anger appetizer with a side of depression, acceptance for the entree and of course a little denial for dessert.
"And that’s how grief should be - all things all at once - actually there is no “should” in grief - grief just is whatever it is for you and that is how it “should be”."
Billie celebrated Christmas in Australia with her fiance Austen Rydell and their 15-month-old son Kingston, and she referenced her arrangement in the tribute to Carrie.
She added: "What better thing to post for my Momby’s Australian death anniversary (4 words I never thought I’d be putting next to each other?!?) than this picture of her and I with a koala!? sending my love to anyone out there who needs it (sic)"
She also marked five years since her mum's death as she teamed up with Kaitlyn Dever and Mady Dever on a cover of Fleetwood Mac's track 'Landslide'.
She wrote: "We loved to sing. We loved Fleetwood Mac. We loved this song. It echoed in our living room throughout my childhood, playing slightly too loudly as she scribbled her marvelous manic musings on yellow legal pads (google them if you don't know them - they're the iPads of the past and are still pretty damn hip if you ask me).
"I didn't know who to be or what to do after my mom died. I was afraid of changing because I had built my life around her. Then she was gone.
"And I had to rebuild my life without her. And it wasn't (and still isn't) easy. But time has made me bolder. I never stop missing her but I have gotten stronger with each passing year."
Tagged in Carrie Fisher