Asia Argento was "angry" with Anthony Bordain for taking his own life.
The 43-year-old actress - who has children Anna Lou, 17, and Nicola, 10, from past relationships - was left in a "hole" and felt she and her family had been abandoned following her partner's suicide in June.
She told DailyMailTV: "The anger kept me alive because, otherwise, this desperation has no end, there's no end.
"And then I was angry, yes, for abandoning my kids. But now it's been replaced just by this loss, this hole that cannot be filled by anything."
Asia previously paid tribute to the 'Parts Unknown' star's "fearless spirit" and described him as her "rock".
Tweeting after his passing, she wrote: "Anthony gave all of himself in everything that he did. His brilliant, fearless spirit touched and inspired so many, and his generosity knew no bounds. He was my love, my rock, my protector. I am beyond devastated. My thoughts are with his family. I would ask that you respect their privacy and mine. (sic)"
Asia - whose romance with the TV chef was first rumoured in February last year - also posted a cryptic snap of herself on Instagram earlier in the day.
In the now-deleted photograph, the actress was seen wearing a T-shirt that read: "F**k everyone."
Asia captioned the image: "You know who you are."
The chef's body was found by his close friend, French chef Eric Ripert, in his hotel room.
And TV network CNN - which aired Anthony's culinary travel guide 'Parts Unknown' - subsequently confirmed that he had taken his own life.
In a statement, the broadcaster explained: "It is with extraordinary sadness we can confirm the death of our friend and colleague, Anthony Bourdain.
"His love of great adventure, new friends, fine food and drink and the remarkable stories of the world made him a unique storyteller. His talents never ceased to amaze us and we will miss him very much. Our thoughts and prayers are with his daughter and family at this incredibly difficult time."
Anthony is survived by his 11-year-old daughter Ariane, his only child with ex-wife Ottavia Busia.
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