Sarah Davis’ experiences as a first time mum inspired her debut poetry book, Baby Daze. Sarah wrote the poems quite spontaneously while up for the 3am feeds and after several weeks she had a finished collection. Here, Sarah shares the top 10 things she’s learnt from motherhood:
Baby Daze
Nobody can prepare you for the intensity of your feelings towards your child.
‘The gripping of my finger with your tiny little hand'
'The feelings and emotions only parents understand’
Motherhood is a massive learning curve. There are more ‘phases’ of development than you could ever imagine possible! Just as you get used to dealing with one phase they are on to the next!
Nobody comes to visit a tidy house – they come to see the baby and you. When your baby is napping use the time to rest and re-charge your batteries.
Everyone has advice for new mums – and it’s often conflicting! Trust your instincts. In my poem ‘Health Visitors’ I wrote:
‘Though guidelines should be followed
We develop our own instincts
And we soon learn what it takes
And we soon learn what it takes
The most helpful thing I learned,
That’s stood me in good stead,
Was early on in clinic
When the health visitor said:
Take on board all our advice
And all that we suggest
Then make your own decisions
And do what you think is best.’
Babies rule! Learn to expect the unexpected.
‘Pram’s in boot
I’d better scoot
Where have I put my keys?’
‘I know well
That awful smell!
No! Not a nappy – please!’
Babies have a habit of making the most organised of parents late.
Support each other. Have couple time and me time – even if you can only manage it when your child is asleep. Non-essential chores can wait.
Take time to enjoy being with your child. They grow up so fast and you can’t get that time back.
No-one is a perfect parent! Every child is different and we can only do our best. Trying to achieve perfection is exhausting and futile.
You can’t get all of the answers from a book. A parenting manual that fits everyone has yet to be written.
Go to Mum and Baby groups – even if the idea of getting out of the house seems too much of an effort it will be worth it.
Mums and Babies Group
‘My local Mums and Babies group
Helps to keep me sane.
With adult conversation
To stimulate my brain.
When I am feeling anxious
It helps to get me through
To hear that all the other mums
Have fears and worries too.
We talk about our babies
And get stuff off our chest
And reassure each other
We can only do our best.
We have a laugh and giggle
About the week we’ve had
Sharing our experience
The good things and the bad.
By the time our tea is finished
And we’ve put the world to rights
We’re re-energised to face
Another week of sleepless nights.’
Baby Daze is published at £7.99 and is available from The Book Guild, Amazon and all good bookshops.