Absent Husband

[Nano]

I'd been with my husband for just 3 months when I conceived with our first child. We subsequently married because we loved each other not because I was pregnant now about 18months later I am pregnant with our second which is probably why all my emotions are all over the place.

The problem is we never spend any time together. He works in a haulage company and working from six in the morning until late at night including weekends. I never get tosee him. I had quite a high level career job until Christmas. when I finally took a career break because I couldn't cope with long hours, a baby and running the house, plus whenever our child was ill it was always me who took time off even though his is a family business and he's a partner. All I want is some time together as a family. At first I imagined things would improve over time even if we could just have one day together every few months, but I can now see that's never going to happen. I've even suggested they rotate their work schedules so each of the partners get time at home but the others don't want to so he won't either. We get a 10day holiday a year and that's it. The other partners even moaned about the amount of time off hubby has had recently two days because my step-dad died and I wanted to stay with my mum when the funeral happened.
All hubby tells me is that the only way things will ever change is if he leaves the business and he is quick to remind me this will destroy his dad so is not an option.
I can't even say I truely love him anymore its impossible to love someone you never see.
I wonder how, if I left him, he would ever find the time to see his children my parents are divorced as are his so it's a real worry for me. Who would want a single mum of two either?

[Kelli]

Nano,
I know exactly how you feel. My now ex husband worked night turn and I hardly seen him! It ruined our marriage. I have 2 children with him. When we married he worked during the day and we had a family life til the day he started working night turn. Ten years have went by and I found myself being lonely, and feeling like a single mother. My children weren't even close to him. I told him something needed to change and he chose not to do anything. As time went on I fell out of love with him. I wasn't getting any love from him since he was never home so How could I stay in love with someone who I was not getting any love from! I totally understand what your saying and feeling, just don't wait to much longer, do something about it. Give him a wake up call before its too late. I wish I would have done something before I fell out of love with him!! Good Luck, hang in there!!