how to tell a girl i have no desire for sex?

Verve · Posted: Fri May 09, 2008 3:34 am Post subject:

So my question now is if you’re not afraid of the kitty kat why won't you allow yourself to play with it? Is oral sex in your definition of sex...? How do you plan on keeping your c*ck from wanting to penetrate if you interact using the above methods? Are you that in control of him? If you fail would you be disappointed in yourself?

dreamguy · Posted: Thu May 15, 2008 9:44 pm Post subject:

Here is one of the reasons I have trouble getting sexually intimate. It has alot to do with the sexual fantasizes I have while I'm masturbating.

Most nights when I'm masturbating I pretend that I'm having sex with God. It's been my fantasy to make love to God when I get to heaven. It's not often that a woman is in my fantasy.

Verve · Posted: Fri May 16, 2008 3:42 am Post subject:

just some guy · Guest

dreamguy · Posted: Fri May 16, 2008 8:24 pm Post subject:

Even monks are not allowed to masturbate

jinjin · FemaleFirst Guru Joined: 11 Oct 2006 Posts: 82160

dreamguy · Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 4:45 am Post subject:

That would be no different than a homosexual seeking psychiatric help to stop being a homosexual.

Since homosexuality is accepted then why is it considered abnormal or wrong to desire sex with God?

Guest · Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 11:24 am Post subject:

You should tell her that right away, she will value your honesty and friendship. Speaking of homosexuals, don't forget that many if not most women love the company of homosexuals. Because they are no threat to them; or at least not perceived as such.

Verve · Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 3:08 pm Post subject:

dreamguy · Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 7:02 pm Post subject:

Polgara69 · Posted: Sun May 18, 2008 8:00 pm Post subject:

Ah somebody needs a big hug! In a huggy jacket. Big Hug

Verve · Posted: Mon May 19, 2008 4:07 am Post subject:

Horioz.(male). · Guest

What do I think? I think sex in a relationship isn't just about your needs. The reason I gave the response above as I did is to point out that sex is about physical bonding and sharing and giving, not just about you getting your rocks off. If you can't engage in this deep bonding process and meet your partner's needs as well as your own then quite frankly you deserve to be in what you call 'the friendzone'. Good luck to you pal.

You are an ignorant tool of the media who cannot understand that some people may have a different method of thought/priorities to your own and therefore immediately write it off as some sort of disorder. Completely closed minded simpleton. Go back to work slave, with your other wine bar yuppie spiky haired pretentious ponce friends.

What he is looking for is someone who has developed in a way that sex is not a huge part of the relationship.

He is concerned that he will come across as abnormal because it is popular belief that men should be very interested in having sex with their partner.

He is trying to find a way to phrase/time it as to not negatively impact her views on the whole issue.

With regards to that Dreamguy,

I think that you obviously should bring it up if she talks about sex. (as mentioned above).

The other way of testing her reaction would be to say that you made a personal/religious vow to not have sex. (don't blast me for suggesting you tell lies you do it too).

I also think that you will be looking for the one who does not draw attention to the subject or shys away from it when you engineer it into the conversation.

If any girl tries to flirt etc with me then I just do not respond. They lose interest etc. Normal reaction.

I am in exactly the same place as you. I will not bother with a relationship at my age (22) as I cannot seem to find any women who are mature enough (don't hit me! hah its an situational circumstance thing), or with similar mindset enough. Who can understand our views on the matter and accept or feel the same way.

I gladly accept all comments from anyone. even the ponce.

Guest · Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 5:09 am Post subject:

Upon further reading,

You sound like you are happy with your sexual output.

What is your desire for a partner? Is it the company? or perhaps the financial reasons?

Or is it to feel normal or loved etc?

I was diagnosed with depersonalization/dissociation disorder. (combat experience). My desire to be with other people is for the humor and opportunities (non sexual) that may arise from being with them. I do enjoy peoples company but am unable to connect on an emotional level (due to stress etc) and therefore only experience sex from the physical stimulus point. This obviously neutralizes my desire for the opposite sex.

Perhaps visit a psychiatrist if not just for the process of elimination.

If the fantasy is not hurting anyone it should not be a concern. Everyone has them.

Building the sort of relationship where you can tell someone these sorts of things takes a long time imo/experience.

Guest · Posted: Tue May 27, 2008 9:30 am Post subject:

why should the girl bother with you? Who in their right mind would want to go out with you and give up a sex life because you are too selfish to get your C*** out?

I hope she see's you for what you are and dumps you like a hot brick. She deserves better, including a nice man who wants her sexually and loves her, not some deluded clown who wants to have sex with the air.