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Female First Forum Forum Index
Yet another should I leave him?
 
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acameron1313
Hello. I am New! Talk to Me


Joined: 13 Mar 2005
Posts: 1


PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 12:49 am    Post subject: Yet another should I leave him? Reply with quote

Okay, here is my story. I've been with him for two years now, we were friends and roomates first then when he went through a horrible brake-up I was there to comfort him. Shortly after that we became sexually envolved, about six months after the sex we we "toghter". Now six months ago I moved across the country for him. Which ment leaving my family who means the world to me. So I am very depresed because my sister who is also my best friend had another child who I bearly know. And my other nice who is the most important person in my life calls me every day to tell me to come home. Now why I should leave him. He has told me in the past that although he knows I love him with all my hart he does not love me the same way. He is mean to me on a regular basis, like saying "I should just go home". But I Love him so much and I am so scared I will never find another man. He treats me kinda like a slave, telling me to go get this and do this now!! I guess the major problem is he is my first love, I am 21 years old and never let myself feel before him. I just need a little bit of insight please anyone help!
Thank you[color=darkblue][/color]
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Lovelee
Hello. I am New! Talk to Me


Joined: 13 Mar 2005
Posts: 1


PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 9:59 am    Post subject: Leave him Reply with quote

Um you deserve more than you are letting yourself have. It is not about this man it is about what you want for yourself. When you say things like he is mean to you or treats you like a slave and you still stay with him you are acknowledging that you are those things. Do you want to be someones SLAVE or have someone be MEAN to you. You should love you first before trying to be with someone else.
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babes
FemaleFirst Chatter (200+ Posts)


Joined: 31 Oct 2004
Posts: 202
Location: birmingham

PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 1:19 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I understand he's your frst love, but you will love again! You deserve so much better, get out whilst you still can!
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sarahb
Hello. I am New! Talk to Me


Joined: 22 Aug 2004
Posts: 12


PostPosted: Sun Mar 13, 2005 7:52 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

im in a sorta same position as , its so horrible being so far away from family when u need them most
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guilty
FemaleFirst Newbie (20+ posts)


Joined: 08 Mar 2005
Posts: 29
Location: Herts UK

PostPosted: Wed Mar 16, 2005 10:03 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

It seams he's making your life a deliberate nightmare to drive you away, he's already told you to go home hun, the message couldnt be clearer, his behaviour will get worse, because youve given him the license to do it .

your family are desperate to have you back, yoru so young love will come along again for you , maybe a few times before you settle down.

take his and your familys advise go home, you dont need this hassle at 21 hun.

Wink
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fan
FemaleFirst Grand Master (1000+ Posts)


Joined: 16 Mar 2005
Posts: 1236
Location: west yorks

PostPosted: Thu Mar 17, 2005 5:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

get rid of him hes not the only man on the planet..........you say he is mean and treats you like a slave well why are you letting him?
he tells you to go home because he knows damn well you wont ......dont let this become the way for the future where you cant be with a man unless he treats you bad because thats the only kind of relationship you know there are lots of good kind men out there and you deserve better........your worth more than this
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P_1984d
FemaleFirst Grand Master (1000+ Posts)


Joined: 21 Mar 2005
Posts: 2901
Location: UK

PostPosted: Mon Mar 21, 2005 7:01 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

You need your family way more than you need this loser. Your family are always there when you need them. Your family gave you life, the most precious thing in the world. Your owe them more than you will ever owe that pr**k. Leaving will be hard, but when it's done you'll be relieved. You are having doubts about being with this guy, is that not reason enough for you to realise? Dont waste anymore years away from your family. I wish I could help
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sloan
FemaleFirst Regular (50+ Posts)


Joined: 21 Mar 2005
Posts: 69
Location: Atlanta, GA

PostPosted: Mon Mar 21, 2005 10:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Go, Go, Go!! I recently was in the same situation this past January. I had just moved in with my fiance (at the time) and he freaked out shortly thereafter. I moved out after only 6 weeks. I moved out of the house while he was out of town on business and he was devastated. He "wooed" me back! Although things are still rough, I had to leave before he ever realized he had a good thing going. However, you need to take care of yourself and go home to your family. You are way too young to hang onto this guy. I can't tell you how many boyfriends I have had since 21. Endless opportunites are out there, but you have to leave and take care of yourself, before the next wonderful guy can come along.
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preciosa
FemaleFirst Regular (50+ Posts)


Joined: 26 Mar 2005
Posts: 63


PostPosted: Sun Mar 27, 2005 8:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

When someone says they donīt love u as much as you love them...BELIEVE IT!
I think itīs time for u to go home, seems like you have all your life ahed to make the right decisions and find someone who truly loves you for yourself and not for being a "slave".
This sounds like a matter of low self steem your end, or lack of respect for yourself.
Nobody deserves being treated MEAN, and if it happens once....why would u let it happen again and again?
Leaving is what I would do. Someone that doesnīt love me, does not deseve my time and all the missing out with the family.

Good luck dear!
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JamesWard
FemaleFirst Newbie (20+ posts)


Joined: 28 Mar 2005
Posts: 30
Location: California

PostPosted: Tue Mar 29, 2005 10:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I didn't actually read your post but my adivice is if you ever have to ask a forum this question the answer is yes you should leave him. Everyone deserve the kind of love where you have no doubts. I didn't say everything is always perfect but you should never have to doubt if he is the soulmate.
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lethally_blonde29
Hello. I am New! Talk to Me


Joined: 26 Mar 2005
Posts: 11


PostPosted: Wed Mar 30, 2005 7:08 am    Post subject: U DESERVE BETTER Reply with quote

u deserve a guy who treats u better and respects u very much, no matter what !!
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Sheeps
FemaleFirst Grand Master (1000+ Posts)


Joined: 29 Dec 2004
Posts: 1255


PostPosted: Sat Apr 02, 2005 8:28 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You say you're scared you won't get anyone else? Rubbish! You're only 21!
You deserve much better than this loser.

If you want to be a doormat, want a miserable life, then yes - stay. You'll become more and more distant from your family, more and more attached to someone who doesn't even love you - and in 20 years time you'll look back on a wasted life.
You frankly deserve better - and you know it. You don't have to post on a forum to know that.

By the way, leave, get out with some friends and within a couple of days you'll find someone to have a laugh with - maybe even someone to "go out seriously" with. You certainly have nothing to be worried about on that score.
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