Like a good cocky/funny response. I don't want to get talking into to specifically, because it's actually not *that* interesting. I mean, I like it, but I want to lay off on topics of work/family/etc. because it doesn't really do anything for women from experience. But I'm still learning how to re-frame things and say something unexpected.
That's a good one! I find it's good to have some default responses to what women throw at you because when I don't, I find things go really downhill from there unless I've given several good responses before that.
That's more of a modest statement, trying to reduce the weight of what impresses them. Actually, this is more along the lines of what I'd say, because it's actually true. But I fear that it's the run-of-the-mill response. It's a little cocky in the "I just happen to captain the team", but could this response increase attraction in a women? I guess that's the point is that I don't want to bore them. I want to use every oppurtunity to create more tension and attraction, and make them laugh at the same time, because I see that it actually works in real life. So if you're a women, does this response do that? I guess try it a few times when it comes up and gauge my results.
"Sometimes I actually feel like the company is running me. That's why I'm looking into other ways of spending my time, like getting to know you. I've worked so hard to come this far, but now it's time to put my efforts into my personal life. I would really like to learn more about you and what brought you here." etc., etc.
You're doing a great job guest25, keep it up. I read your initial post on your upbringing, relationship problems, etc. I meant to write to you on that before, but was extremely busy with finals. I hope you're doing well. Best of luck! Not that you need it, especially if you do put as much effort into your relationships as you have with your professional life.
You'd be surprised, but it's not something I'm hugely proud of, although I admit that some people might be. The truth is, I need a handle on relationships, and I really need to wire in some default responses to questions where "normal" answers don't do anything.
I mean, there have been *some* occasions, despite my social cowardess, where I had many a 5-minute conversation with a women. Logical answers, answers where I look like a wuss, or things that just sound "normal" don't work. And when I got the confidence to talk to more women lately, the typical responses my mind generates are equally as pathetic, and conversations go nowhere. Even when I don't act like a wuss, I just feel it's too formal or normal. I can't make it funny, warm and light. Women just aren't interested in this kind of thing.
You can say it's an attitude thing, but some responses just aren't interesting. Yes, running my own company advocates power/authority, because you need those things to do what I do, but at the same time, my company is a software company, which is mostly phone/internet based... and I don't do sales. So basically while my intelligence and experienced is used to make good decisions, and I have the authority/power to really make those decisions and influenece others fairly easily, it's still not the same as say being the CEO of more dynamic companies that work with their external environments a lot more. It's just not very social. The most social aspects are carried out by people who are more equipped to handle them. Unless it's serious, like creating an alliance with another company, or a company threatening to sue us or some BS... and then I take care of that.
So, my request is very serious. I actually have all kinds of things being thrown at me that I have very little clue on how to deal with them. The default responses my mind generates is either "expected" or weird. I need to get a handle on this. It's hard because I basically avoided talking with strangers for years and years unless I had to. And most of them thought I was too socially tuned out that they acted really strange around me. I'm just trying to fix the past and I'm trying to make it not matter anymore.[/b]
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