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Female First Forum Forum Index
How to suck your own dick: A Guide for the Spinal Challenged
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PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 4:32 am    Post subject: How to suck your own dick: A Guide for the Spinal Challenged Reply with quote

In order to suck yourself off, you need to have one of two things (preferably both): a very flexible spine, or a very long dick. Having a longer penis obviously makes self-sucking easier by decreasing the distance from your C*** head to your mouth, so the longer your dick, the less you have to bend. However, since penis length is something you either have or don’t, we’ll concentrate on what you can do to increase your spinal flexibility.

The easiest and probably most effective position for autofellatio is lying on your back. You’ll probably want to use a bed, sofa, or other cushioned surface for comfort, although practicing on a carpeted floor can sometimes give you better leverage. You should have a wall or a headboard nearby to brace your feet against. Lie down , with the top of your head at least a foot from the wall. Pull your legs up and roll back onto your shoulders, raising your legs over your head. Brace your feet on the wall and “walk” your way down until your crotch is close to your face. Lift your head up if necessary to get closer. If your back feels tight, don’t strain to reach your C***, even if it’s tantalizingly close. Just let your muscles stretch. You may want to use one hand to pull your C*** closer. Suck what you can, if you can – otherwise, just W*** and keep practicing.
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pinkroxy
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Joined: 15 Feb 2007
Posts: 10460
Location: pink sparkly fairyland

PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 4:44 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

your funny Laughing
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~twisted~
FemaleFirst Chatter (200+ Posts)


Joined: 23 Jul 2007
Posts: 438


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 7:57 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? Very Happy
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drew
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 4643


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 7:59 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

~twisted~ wrote:
Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? Very Happy


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPCA dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to


Last edited by drew on Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:40 am; edited 1 time in total
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~twisted~
FemaleFirst Chatter (200+ Posts)


Joined: 23 Jul 2007
Posts: 438


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="drew"]
~twisted~ wrote:
Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? Very Happy


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???
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drew
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 4643


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:41 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="~twisted~"]
drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:
Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? Very Happy


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???


DOH i ment RSPCA (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) still geting over food posining so not realy on the ball
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~twisted~
FemaleFirst Chatter (200+ Posts)


Joined: 23 Jul 2007
Posts: 438


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:50 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote="drew"]
~twisted~ wrote:
drew wrote:
~twisted~ wrote:
Got any tips on how to lick your own p*ssy? Very Happy


its quite easy the trick is making sure the RSPC dont find out ... sorry couldnt stop that joke if i wanted to[/quote

It's a shame I don't get it! What's the RSPC???


DOH i ment RSPCA (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals) still geting over food posining so not realy on the ball


My pussy loves to be licked!

(Sorry to hear you have been feeling bad).
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drew
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 28 Dec 2005
Posts: 4643


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 8:56 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

~twisted~ wrote:


My pussy loves to be licked!

(Sorry to hear you have been feeling bad).


mine are self cleaning the lick them selfs Shocked

(thanks feeling better today Smile)
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The Phantom Ejeculator
Guest






PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 1:18 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

If all men could suddenly suck their own dicks, women would be obsolete in a heart beat & half the world would be late for work! Very Happy
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~twisted~
FemaleFirst Chatter (200+ Posts)


Joined: 23 Jul 2007
Posts: 438


PostPosted: Sun Aug 05, 2007 5:55 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Noooo..... Smile Men like doggy style too much!

Makes me think of a couple of lines in some movies.

"I'm the king of the world!!!"

and...

"I'ts good to be the king!"
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jinjin
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 11 Oct 2006
Posts: 85424


PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 1:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

For men who lack the flexibility, there is an alternative ... http://tinyurl.com/zav0
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THAT_GUEST
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 17121
Location: aiyeeee....dat good pie!

PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 1:52 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Jinjin, I challenge you to a Lightdildo/sabre duel! Laughing
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jinjin
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 11 Oct 2006
Posts: 85424


PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 3:30 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Laughing Laughing Laughing

I see you have been exploring the site.


Laughing Laughing Laughing
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THAT_GUEST
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 18 Jan 2007
Posts: 17121
Location: aiyeeee....dat good pie!

PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 3:35 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

for whatever reason, your links are interesting to me. I couldn't resist. The light sabre dildos Laughing Laughing
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jinjin
FemaleFirst Guru


Joined: 11 Oct 2006
Posts: 85424


PostPosted: Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:43 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Your comment reminded me of the fight scene between Lone Star and Dark Helmet in Mel Brook's Space Balls. Laughing

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ee7PmhT9Nyw
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