Hitting children

[Guest]

A three year old needs genuine guidance not smacking! Talk to them/tone of voice/threaten to take treats away unless they behave in a way thats acceptable and deserving/let them tanrum and ignore them/take their attention elsewhere/ignore all bad behaviour. There are lots of techniques that can be used.

So stealing their treats is OK but smacking is not?

What sort of example is this setting?

[Miss V]

All children are different. Some need a good smack to keep them in line and some need as little as a time out. There are many methods of discipline and smacking should be allowed to be one of them if necessary.
However it seems strange to me to spank a child still in diapers. I feel that if they can't rationalize when its time to use the bathroom then they cant rationalize the consequenses of their actions. Thus spanking should be the last resort or not used at all in that case.

[noodles]

A three year old needs genuine guidance not smacking! Talk to them/tone of voice/threaten to take treats away unless they behave in a way thats acceptable and deserving/let them tanrum and ignore them/take their attention elsewhere/ignore all bad behaviour. There are lots of techniques that can be used.

So stealing their treats is OK but smacking is not?

What sort of example is this setting?

Ok ok - what i meant was dont give them treats if they misbehave - of course i wouldnt endorse giving them something and taking it away again

[Guest]

i could never hit my child. I remember how aweful it was from my parents. No child should have to deal with a parents anger like that.

[Guest]

i could never hit my child. I remember how aweful it was from my parents. No child should have to deal with a parents anger like that.

I'm really sorry to hear that.
No child should be smacked in anger and it's sometimes very difficult to avoid it.
I smack my children. It's a measured response, generally on the hand, leg or bottom and with my fingers. They are 3 and 5 years old. The force I use is very controlled and is designed to give a quick reprisal, never a lasting pain. As my boys know I'm not bluffing, a threat of a smack is frequently enough to establish discipline. That's much better than actually doing it. I've taught them self control and self discipline. There are times when they push too far though and that's when they get smacked. As I say, the smack is very controlled and measured.

[Guest]

i could never hit my child. I remember how aweful it was from my parents. No child should have to deal with a parents anger like that.

I'm really sorry to hear that.
No child should be smacked in anger and it's sometimes very difficult to avoid it.
I smack my children. It's a measured response, generally on the hand, leg or bottom and with my fingers. They are 3 and 5 years old. The force I use is very controlled and is designed to give a quick reprisal, never a lasting pain. As my boys know I'm not bluffing, a threat of a smack is frequently enough to establish discipline. That's much better than actually doing it. I've taught them self control and self discipline. There are times when they push too far though and that's when they get smacked. As I say, the smack is very controlled and measured.

As far as i am concern regardless if it is a measured smack or not it is still as mack and more importantly it is assault and you can be charge for it under the law. A adult wouldn't hit another adult so why should a child be any different.

[noodles]

i give mine emotional punishments - lots of put downs and things to make them realise they are in the wrong and how bad they are to behave in certain ways - for example if my daughter runs in the road, i tell her what a 'stupid irresponsible diabolical child she is'. if my son hits his sister i tell him very calmly that he is a 'bullying idiot and that only arseholes behave this way' its all measured tho imo so thats ok i wreckon. whatever.

[Guest]

[Guest]

As far as i am concern regardless if it is a measured smack or not it is still as mack and more importantly it is assault and you can be charge for it under the law. A adult wouldn't hit another adult so why should a child be any different.[/quote]

It's not illegal in England.

As I've said before, adult punishment doesn't work on children. If I do wrong, the court hearing could be months after the crime and I could be imprisoned. Try doing that to a 3 year old. They won't know why they're being punished and locking them in their room for weeks is cruelty.
The punishment must fit the deed and the individual. Children are not adults and cannot be treated as such.

[Guest]

[quote=".]
As far as i am concern regardless if it is a measured smack or not it is still as mack and more importantly it is assault and you can be charge for it under the law. A adult wouldn't hit another adult so why should a child be any different.

[Jon Phoenix Brookstone]

To those who think that "smacking" their kids and "beating" their kids are different things, consider using a dictionary:

Smack ~ to strike
Beat ~ To strike

Interesting how Oxford classified both as the same thing. So stop trying to argue that they're different because they aren't. And in the eyes of the child you're hitting, that difference won't matter. What will matter is that the person they used to think they could rely on is causing them pain.

And FYI ~ most kids do not develop the cognitive capacity to discern right and wrong, and the fact that other people have feelings until age six or seven (look up Jean Piaget). Why parents don't ever learn cognitive psychology before they have kids is beyond me.

And FYI ~ 18 years down the road ~ hit a kid enough, they won't forget it. And if they're smart enough, they just might end up leaving you permanently for your history of pad parenting. And you'll be left one sorry pile of remorse without your own kids loving you.

Don't believe me, ask my parents.

[Guest]

Well, my son is only 11 weeks old, but when the time comes and hes being really naughtly and won't behave, i will be administering discipline with a little smack here and there!! I only ever had two big smacks in my childhood, both given for bad behaviour, both remembered well and the lesson learnt!!

I suggest you go to parent school and learn how to discipline your child with out resorting to smacking.

[Jbabe]

I totally disagree with hitting a child .. there is no sense and no point behind it .. all you are doing is making yourself look bad .. i think that it is perthetic and i think that anyone who does deserves to be locked up .. There are lots of other ways of disciplining your children
Thanks fro reading